A recent poll found that women orgasm less than men during sex. But the gap isn't because of sex differences between the genders, but rather different sexual experiences and habits. Sexuality educator Jane Fleishman says she once worked with an 80-something-year-old newly widowed woman who hadn't ever experienced an orgasm. Fleishman's solution was to have her explore and play with her clitoris, which is usually the source of female orgasm.
The clit, which is located just above the entrance to the vagina, can be stimulated with a variety of techniques. Try rubbing it or stroking the head, which is found at the tip of the glans (the part that sticks out of your labia). You can also use your fingers to stroke around the entire area, especially the hood, and even try the frenulum, which looks like an upside down V on the underside of the head. Use lube to heighten sensation and help prevent friction pain.
Another way to stimulate the clit is to kiss it. This can be a bit of a challenge because of the sensitive location, but it may be surprisingly pleasurable. The clit is made up of two tubes of erectile tissue that are engorged with blood when you're aroused, which creates pressure and lubrication for the vaginal canal.
Whether you want to experiment with your clit on your own or with a partner, just keep in mind that everyone's clit is different. Some people might have a harder, larger or more sensitive clit than others. For some people a clitoral erection doesn't cause much sensation and isn't noticed until they're turned on.