Whether you’re in the process of exploring golden showers with a new partner or are already a devotee of the pee kink, it’s important to be respectful and open about the experience. “As with any kink, you want to make sure your partner is comfortable,” says Frye-Nekrasova. “Start by asking them if they know what you’re talking about and if so, offer some general information.” From there, it’s up to you and your partner to decide if you can move forward.
As the name suggests, golden showers are a kink that involves peeing on someone for sexual pleasure. Also known as urolagnia, it’s an activity that is common in the BDSM community, with some people even turning into human urinals for this purpose.
But it’s not without its risks. The fluid can spread bacterial, fungal, and viral infections—particularly if the recipient has an open wound. And, of course, it’s important to be careful with herpes, which can be transmitted via any bodily fluid—even if the person has no visible symptoms or open sores.
But despite the pee kink’s negative press (as highlighted by serial killer Albert Fish, who posted ads seeking widows to urinate on him and offered his urine in cups) it’s actually an incredibly common fetish. “People love to be peed on, and a lot of them like to drink it,” New York-based lifestyle dominatrix Goddess Aviva tells Cosmopolitan.